It's three a.m. on a Sunday morning. Today will be my third Sunday and, unbelievably, only my sixteenth full day in-site. I awoke just now in a cloud of unnamed anxiety and while writing is typically a way I process anxiety and refocus attention, I'm afraid to say it plays a roll in the stress I feel at this moment.
As of today I have posted a total of 108 posts starting from the time it became clear I would probably be invited to serve and leading up to today. So far, my blogging efforts comprise the most ambitious undertaking of my time in the Peace Corps given the obstacles to posting updates and the change in lifestyle, but now that I am actually beginning my service, this is about to change.
Like perhaps a lot of volunteers, I feel a desire to capture my experience in writing and share this chapter of my life with the people I love. Unlike most people, though, I begin to feel anxiety every time the date approaches when I will have no new material in the queue to be published. Combine this with the anxiety of feeling like I ought to be doing more at work, and something has got to give.
I hope that in the coming months, I can learn to balance my desire to blog with my need to become a part of my community and be the best volunteer I can be.